The Attitude of Acceptance

Consider some of the things most of us find difficult to accept: criticism, discomfort, illness, mistakes, problems, failure, loss, etc. On the other hand, we cannot resist its counterparts: comfort, good health, victory and success. So perhaps the problem does not lie in our ability to accept but rather in what we choose to accept. Why can’t we welcome everything into our lives in the same way?

Perfect mystics understand the nature of life. They possess the quality of equanimity because they know that everything that happens in this world is a result of the divine plan. Regardless of the challenges they face, they remain calm. They focus on the actions that allow them to resolve situations in the most effective and graceful way possible. Their advice to us is this:

We must accept the events of life. You cannot change the course of the events of life, but you can always adjust to them. Adjusting to the events of life will always make you happy and relaxed. If you swim against the waves, you will drown. If you swim along with the waves, you will get to the shore easily.
_{Maharaj Charan Singh, Spiritual Perspectives, Vol. III}

In another instance Maharaj Charan Singh adds that the very fact we have to go along with the waves automatically makes us happy because there is no other way. In modern life, we are often overwhelmed with so many choices that this reminder of not really having a choice may actually be comforting. Or rather, we have just one choice: to accept or resist that which we cannot change.

He also reminds us that we are creators of our own destiny. We have chosen our parts to play.

You have sown your own seeds; your own seeds have created your destiny … we can’t hold the Father responsible. He has written only what we have sown. But to go through that cheerfully is contentment.
_{Maharaj Charan Singh, Spiritual Perspectives, Vol. III}

We cannot choose the outcome of our past actions. But acceptance of our situation enables us to surrender to the divine flow of life. We begin to realize that the only choice we have is to watch our destiny unfold.

The Masters suggest that we become willing spectators and witness our destiny. That means going through life almost as if we were watching a movie of it. The phrase “willing spectator” implies that we can enjoy this movie even if it has some sad scenes in it.

Our past karmas cannot be changed, but we can strengthen ourselves so that we can face our karmas without losing our balance. Resisting our destiny is like adding fuel to the fire. On the other hand, acceptance can convert the painful blow of a hammer to a harmless pinprick. The Masters often say that we can help ourselves by staying positive and focusing on our objective; that success does not depend on not having any problems, but on how we face and solve those problems.

And finally, Maharaj Charan Singh also suggests that we can derive happiness by reminding ourselves of the path and surrendering to the Master’s guidance.

That very concept should make us happy – that now we have realized we have the Father, we have a destination, we have some objective to achieve. We know the path, we know what to do, and if we practise that, automatically we will have a feeling of bliss and peace within. If you are in a jungle and somebody points out the direction of your house, it makes you happy. Now at least you know in which direction you have to go. You’re not looking in the dark. You will get real happiness when you reach your home, but just knowing the direction and the road which leads you back to your house makes you happy.
_{Maharaj Charan Singh, Spiritual Perspectives, Vol. III}

Our journey home has been planned according to our karmic dues and we must remind ourselves often that the Lord makes much better plans than we do. We do not know what is good for us but he does. We must learn to have faith in his wisdom. And the key to cultivating an attitude of acceptance is meditation.

Meditation trains you to accept what is in your destiny, if not cheerfully then at least with a smile. That is the purpose of meditation. Every day has to be lived. So we should plan for the day and then live it thoroughly and happily, and attend to our meditation. That is the only way one can get out of these worldly worries and worldly problems. And learn to accept rather than demand.
_{Maharaj Charan Singh, Spiritual Perspectives, Vol. III}

Acceptance is a spiritual quality. It helps us to navigate the ups and downs of life and keeps us in a state of peace and equanimity.

To be freed from our karmic entanglements and led back to our true home – that is our ultimate destiny. To achieve this, we are fortunate to have the guidance of a perfect living Master. This journey can be made easier by cultivating an attitude of acceptance and attending to our meditation practice. With spiritual progress and our own personal experience, we will eventually see things for what they truly are. Once we achieve this deeper understanding of life, acceptance will come to us naturally and automatically.

All our peace in this present life should depend on humble forbearance rather than on absence of adversity. He who knows the secret of endurance will enjoy the greatest peace. Such a one is conqueror of self, master of the world, a friend of Christ, and an heir of Heaven.
_{Thomas à Kempis, The Imitation of Christ}