Three monkeys sat in a coconut tree discussing things as they’re said to be, Said one to the others, "Now listen you two, there’s a certain rumour (that can’t be true) That man descended from our noble race. The very idea - ’tis a dire disgrace! No monkey ever deserted his wife, starved her baby and ruined her life. And you’ve never known a mother monk to leave her baby with others to bunk, Or pass them on from one to another, till they hardly know who is their mother. And another thing you will never see is a monk build a fence round a coconut tree And let the coconuts go to waste, forbidding all other monks a taste. Why, if I put a fence around this tree, starvation would force you to steal from me. Here’s another thing a monkey won’t do: go out at night and get in a stew, Or use a gun or a club or a knife to take some other monkey’s life. Yes! Man descended, the ornery cuss, but, brothers, he didn’t descend from us!" Anon, published in With the Three Masters, Vol. III
