Something to Think About

An initiate should never break the sacred pledges made at the time of initiation. If one cannot make this small sacrifice for the sake of attaining God-realization, then all talk of love of God and devotion is without meaning.
_{Maharaj Charan Singh, Quest for Light}

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Please remember that our own mind is our only enemy and creates all sorts of illusions and delusions to lead us astray. We have to fight this power through meditation with faith and devotion. Do not worry. Once the Master takes charge of a soul, he takes it back home. It is only a question of time, which depends on how soon we are able to unburden ourselves of our karmas and are free to go back home.
_{Maharaj Charan Singh, Quest for Light}

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Am glad to know that you appreciate the privilege of initiation and are putting in the regular hours of meditation. It is, however, a very slow process, except in the case of those who have trodden the path in a previous incarnation. You should not expect results too soon. Slow and steady wins the race. Also, what is achieved and consolidated gradually is lasting.
_{Maharaj Jagat Singh, The Science of the Soul}