The Only One in the World to Love

A New Birth – 18 June 2005
Exactly four years ago, the most gracious gift of all gifts was granted to me – the gift of initiation. I was the young girl who felt that this was it – that this in itself was an end, an achievement. And sitting for my meditation for two and a half hours daily was going to be an easy routine.

A Newer Reality – 18 June 2009
I wondered what life before 2005 was. I corrected my thoughts: life was not life then. It was mere existence. And neither was meditation easy, nor was it a routine, to be done and finished with. Meditation was, as Dr Julian Johnson put it, “a living vibrant force – it could be heard, and its power could be felt.” Of course, it took me years to understand this. Even today, I am a young baby and am only scratching the surface of the vast reality within.

But there are days, like today, when that feeling arises more strongly. When you realize the treasure you have received is no small one. That it is not a treasure that is hidden, but one that permeates each cell of your being; that shapes each thought, each action, each desire.

And the more you meditate, the more you want to meditate, the more you feel the need, the craving to meditate from within. When simran has become the only mode of conversation with the Divine, (and how badly you need to converse with the Divine!), when the world is falling apart, when fear surrounds you, when anger consumes you, when complaints are the only vibes that flow from you, when it is beyond any human being’s capacity to help you even if they wished to, you turn to simran. And He listens to you; you feel it. Churning each round, you just put in your effort.

The Only One in the World to Love
And before you know it, you feel the difference, you feel the presence. You feel that awareness of being listened to, of being loved … like you were the only one in the world to love! And you know what the magic potion is; and that is when you do not want to leave it – no matter what your circumstance in life is. Whether you are content with life or complaining, meditation becomes your insatiable need – your first priority, your constant contact.

And So…
On days like these, you want to pause and reflect … and thank the Divine for nothing else except this gift, without which everything else is bland. You want to vow yet again to keep doing your best. You want to live with the divine presence throughout your day. You thank Him for never leaving you, for being faithfully present and patiently persistent, for loving each one of His children as if she were the only one in the world to love.

O my God, the best of Thy gifts within my heart is the hope of Thee
  and the sweetest word upon my tongue is Thy praise,
and the hours which I love best are those in which I meet with Thee.
_{Rabia Basri, as quoted in Rabi’a the Mystic and Her Fellow-Saints in Islam}